I Love/Hate the 4th of July

I love the 4th of July! I just do. I'm pretty sure I always have. I don't even know why.

Ok, ok, I know why....

Here are a few reasons:

1. The Warren 4th of July Parade - Yes, my hometown has a parade, and it's awesome! People literally come from far and wide. You don't even understand. We locals put our lawn chairs out along the parade route up to a week in advance just to reserve our prime seating. My cousins and I used to sit right on the curb so that when candy would be thrown from the floats, we could be the first to run and get it. Heading home with a sack full of candy was the only way to go! Then when it was time for the much anticipated Zem Zem cars to perform, we pulled our feet to safety so that as the little cars roared past us, our toes wouldn't be in any danger of getting run over. But we were still always a bit scared, nonetheless, which was part of the fun. And finally we would spot our grandpa, all decked out as Poppy the Clown. After getting a family picture with him, certain relatives, like my mother, thought that it was time to go home. But I always wanted to stay til the end. For me, there is just something truly delightful about a parade. I honestly think everyone should make the effort to come to my parade. I'm serious.When I spent a summer in Harrisburg, I assumed that our state capital would certainly have an even more spectacular parade to celebrate our country's birthday. Nope. No parade. None. Warren is the place for a parade. You can laugh at me all you want, but it makes me sad to be anywhere else on the 4th of July if I have to miss my favorite parade. 

2. The Annual Family Camping trip - When I was young, my whole family used to go camping over the 4th of July. It was one of my favorite times in the entire year. My cousins and I would go on many an adventure. We loved walking to the nearby creek to catch as many crayfish as we possibly could. And of course we had to bring them all back to show our parents what valiant crayfish hunters we were. They were never nearly as impressed with our skills as we were, so they made us promptly release our little hostages back into their natural habitats. We also loved taking long bike rides and discovering new trails in the beautiful surrounding woods. And night is when the fun would really begin. Fireflies would emerge from the trees, and it became our favorite game to spot them all and catch them in a jar. My aunt would sing songs with us around the campfire for what seemed like hours on end. She always had new ones to teach us. We especially loved the one about the Austrian yodeler. And to top it all off we roasted marshmallows til they were perfectly golden brown and made s'mores. In fact, it was on one of our camping excursions where I had my very first s'more. What a thing of beauty! 

3. Fireworks - If there could be a fireworks display every night, I'm pretty sure that I still wouldn't get sick of them. I just really love fireworks. They're my favorite. And through some stroke of genius, America has decided to particularly embrace these beautiful things and set them perfectly to music to celebrate it's birthday. Whoever thought of such an idea surely gets a gold star in my book. 

4. Summer - The 4th of July is pretty much the quintessential celebration of summer! And I love summer! No other season even comes close! It's warm! It's beautiful! It's perfect! 

5. America's birthday - I love America! I really do! And I feel very privileged to have been born here. When I stop to think of it, I feel so humbled that I get to benefit from all the advantages that living in this nation affords me. I'm thankful that those who came before me were willing to fight for freedom and to make our country great. I may or may not even get a little teary during songs like "God Bless the USA."


But...despite these wonderful things that make the 4th of July particularly enchanting in my mind, there are a few things that make me sad when reality actually hits. The truth is, my present experience of the holiday can never quite seem to live up to the memory of past celebrations. My family doesn't go camping anymore. Various family members can't even travel in anymore. And sometimes it just literally rains on my parade. But even if we were all together and did the same things, I know it still wouldn't feel the same. And I just long for someone in my life to understand how much these things have meant to me, someone who loves me with a red love, someone who just wants to be with me in the longing and disappointment, someone who deeply desires to make it all better. But it feels like no such someone will ever appear. Thus, though I do love the 4th of July, it often ends up disappointing me. 

Unsurprisingly, I'm not the only one who experiences this sort of disappointment. In his book, The Prodigal God, Tim Keller writes about the very same feelings. He says:
"Many of us have fond memories of times, people, and places where we felt truly home. However, if we ever have an opportunity to get back to the places we remember so fondly, we are usually disappointed...Home, then, is a powerful but elusive concept. The strong feelings that surround reveal some deep longing within us for a place that absolutely fits and suits us, where we can be, or perhaps find, our true selves. Yet it seems that no real places or actual family ever satisfies these yearnings, though many situations arouse them." Keller then goes on to say that starting with Adam and Eve's expulsion from Eden, the Bible records one account of exile after another, and that as God's people, we have been wandering in search of our true home ever since. "That is, we have been living in a world that no longer fits our deepest longings"(91-96).

So if what I'm looking for no longer exists in this world, as long as I'm trying to find it here, I am sure to only encounter greater and greater disappointments. If I want true hope, I have to face the fact that as long as I'm living on earth, I will feel like an exile who's looking forward to my true home. Heaven is the place where I really belong, where all these longings are sure to be satisfied. Jesus is the one who has gone there to prepare a place for me, after He first came here - into my exile - so that He could pay the price for the sins that had isolated me from my Father's house and from Him - my true love (John 14:1-7). 

And if I'm longing for someone who understands, no one understands what it means to be an exile more than Jesus. He left His home from all eternity to become a man - to enter my world of hurt and sin and brokenness. And He did it all to right the wrong that I committed but couldn't undo. (John 1:1-14). I deserve to feel the pains that sin has brought into this world, because I spit in my Father's face and separated myself from Him. Yet He had compassion on me, made it right once and for all through the cross, is making it right through the process of redemption, and will one day make all things right when He finally defeats sin and death forever. The someone I have been hoping for has come, is with me now, and will appear again (Matthew 28:20, Colossians 3:4, Titus 2:11-14).

And if that's really the case, then it's ok that I won't find what I'm looking for now. I can just simply enjoy the simple pleasures of the 4th of July without expectation that they will live up to my memories. And I can enjoy the new memories as they form. I can thank the Lord that He gives us so much grace to let us see little glimpses of the things we'll experience in eternity. And I can know for sure, that He's the One who created me, loves me deeply, knows me better than anyone else, and experiences the joy in my heart right along with me when I love the things He's made me to love. And when I feel that divine homesickness that is so apt to pop up, He feels it on my behalf and can't wait til He can bring me home to Him forever. 

In the midst of all we love and long for...Loving Him is Red!

Do you have memories of special events or times that often leave you disappointed when present realities don't measure up? What would it look like to simply enjoy them and let them point you to your true love and heavenly home?