Real Men Love Like Jesus

If you've spent any amount of time with me, you've probably heard me talk about Finn and Rachel, 2 main characters from Glee. Their relationship is my favorite thing about the show. I guess it must be their red love. So I figured it was about time to see if there was anything about their relationship that could point us to Jesus. What I found most recently is that when Finn acts like a man, especially in his relationship with Rachel, I am particularly reminded of my longing for Jesus.    

For those of you who watch Glee, I hope you had adequate time to catch up on the Valentine's Day episode, I Do. (If you're not caught up, and want to be, stop reading and get caught up. Yes, this is your spoiler alert.) So now that you're all caught up, I hope that you'll let me rave for a little while about the fabulous speech that Finn makes in this episode. 

Don't watch Glee? It's ok! Here's what you need to know: Finn and Rachel meet through their high school's glee club, fall in love, end up dating on and off and get engaged their senior year. But they don't end up getting married as planned, (even though they're totally meant to be together) because Finn wants Rachel to follow her dreams to NYC. After she realizes that Finn has no current direction in life, she eventually starts dating another guy, claiming she's done with Finn until he starts acting like a man again. 

I would like to suggest that the speech Finn makes in this episode shows that he has truly grown in his understanding of what it means to be a man, and in doing so, he points us to Jesus. And it's awesome!

Here's what Finn says to Rachel while they're both home for a friend's wedding:

"You and I both know how this thing ends. I don't know how, or when, and I don't care where you're living or what dope you're shacked up with. You're my girlfriend. We are endgame. I know that and you know that."

Why do I think that this speech is so awesome?!?

There are three things from Finn's speech that show he's a real man and point us to Jesus:


1) A real man loves boldly, because Jesus loves boldly!
Finn confidently declares his affection for Rachel by telling her that they are going to end up together. And he does so even though she has currently chosen another guy. He doesn't just crumble. He doesn't shrink back. He takes the risk and speaks truth to her. God has been confidently and boldly declaring His affection for His people pretty much since He created us. And the ultimate way He did so was when He sent Jesus to earth. Jesus knew we were going to reject and kill Him, yet He continued to boldly preach the good news of His great love for us.  Jesus' death on the cross was the boldest declaration of love there ever was!

2) A real man loves persistently, because Jesus loves persistently!
Finn says that he doesn't care how long it takes until he and Rachel are together again - he's going to go after her and she's going to be his. He is not going to let any obstacles get in his way. He is not going to give up. God has been persistent with us, though we humans are particularly stubborn creatures, He is even more stubborn in His love. We run away and He chases us. Jesus chased us all the way to earth and into our very humanity by becoming like us (Hebrews 2). He could have given up on us so many times. But He doesn't. Instead, He relentlessly pursues us with His love. 

3) A real man is forgiving, because Jesus is forgiving!
Rachel is living with another guy, yet Finn still wants her, still loves her, still greatly desires to end up with her. No amount of pain that he must bear can change what she means to him or her identity as his girlfriend. It doesn't matter how much she has crushed his heart - she's the one he's chosen to love, and he refuses to hold her misdeeds against her. God knows all too well what it's like to love a woman, the Church, who is essentially living with another man by worshiping other gods. (If that sounds weird, check out the book of Hosea or Ezekiel 16.) We crush God's heart every time we sin and choose to love something else more than Him. But because Jesus sacrificed His life on our behalf, He forgives us and treats us as though we had never sinned. Our sins cannot change how much He loves us or our identity as His Bride.

So... 

Men - When you find a godly woman you want to pursue, have considered wisdom, and have gotten counsel regarding the person and the timing, I really hope you'll pursue her this way - the way that Jesus pursued the Church - boldly, persistently, and with a forgiving heart. I know it must sound terrifying, but I hope you'll be a man and take the bold risk of putting your affections on the table so that she has a chance to respond. I hope you'll persistently and patiently fight for her heart. And I hope that you'll continue to forgive her and show her the grace of Jesus every step of the way. If you do that, chances are, you'll teach that woman more about Jesus' love than anyone else she's ever known! But as much as you can point to Jesus, you'll never be able to pursue any woman as boldly, as relentlessly, and with such a forgiving heart as Jesus can. In fact, you need Jesus to pursue you this way to even give you the slightest bit of hope to imitate Him. And because He has pursued you this way, you have so much hope to image Him to the world around you, whether you're currently in the position to pursue a woman, or not.

Ladies - Wait for a man who will pursue you this way - like Jesus pursued the Church - boldly, persistently, and with a forgiving heart. I know it can be really painful to wait on God's timing and that it's easy to feel foolish for turning down other offers that seem to contain the promise of love and affection, but marriage was meant to display the gospel! And when it does, it's the most beautiful thing in the world! Chances are, if you wait for a man who will pursue you this way, he'll end up teaching you more about Jesus' love than anyone else you've ever known! I think that's something worth waiting for! But as great as a man can be in pointing you to Jesus, he'll never be able to pursue you as boldly, as relentlessly, and with such a forgiving heart as Jesus. You'll never find the fulfillment you're looking for if you just wait for a man to pursue you this way - you have to find your hope in the fact that Jesus is everything you've been waiting for. 

 Jesus is the man you want, and you already have Him. Jesus is the man you want to be, and He's already stood in your place as your substitute. All in all: Loving Him is Red.

Alright Gleeks, any other ways that Finchel reminds you of your longing for Jesus?

The Greatest Love of All Time

Ok, so I know some of you love Twilight. And I know some of you love to hate it. But maybe we could just take a step back from our emotional biases and see if there's any way that it might point us to our longing for Jesus. It is a love story, after all. One might even say that it's a story about red love. (If you missed my discussion on red love, you can check it out here.)

When I first heard of The Twilight Saga, I wasn't really interested in all of the hype. I actually tried to ignore it. But then a wise friend said something that really struck me. He said that if so many people love Twilight enough to make it a worldwide pop culture phenomenon, then it must contain some sort of connection to the gospel. There must be some picture of how Christ loved his people, the Church, enough to die on her behalf.

And honestly, I had never really thought about it that way before. But the more I considered it, the more I realized that it must be true. Because God created us to love Him, and if you take a look at what we love, you'll always find a shadow of Jesus cast upon whatever we've chosen to give our affections to. So that realization was enough to convince me that it was time to really take a look at Twilight through the lens of the gospel. 

So that's what I did. I watched the movies. I read the books. In fact, I just saw Breaking Dawn 2 again when it played in the HUB this past weekend at Penn State. I will not lie to you. The first time I saw the ending, I thought it was so beautiful that I pretty much sobbed my way through it. Ok, ok, I know you're not really that surprised...crying is pretty typical for me. But whenever my emotions are triggered like that, it's usually pretty helpful to start asking questions like, "Why?"

(Now in case you haven't seen the movies or read the books but are planning to do so, it would be the appropriate time for me to tell you that I will be talking about the ending. So in the event that you want to be surprised, consider this your spoiler alert.

If however, you are unfamiliar with the Twilight Saga and would like a very brief synopsis, here we go: Edward and Bella end up attending the same high school, fall in love and are obviously meant to be together, but continue to face many obstacles on the way to their happy ending. Despite these obstacles, they manage to get married and eventually embrace their "perfect piece of forever.")

So back to the question of "Why?" Why did I sob through the ending of Breaking Dawn? 

3 reasons

1) It highlights the aspect of grace involved in their love story - which points to the grace that the Lord has given in redeeming us for Himself through Christ. As we see a flashback montage of Bella's meaningful moments with Edward, (set to A Thousand Years by Christina Perri) we are reminded that Bella is utterly amazed that this man, who is her ideal of perfection, would actually even notice, let alone love, her. But we also know that Edward is similarly amazed that Bella could love him for what he is. And that's a picture of what our relationship with Christ is like. Jesus is perfect, and we're not, yet for some reason, He took notice of us, loved us and chose to die for us to make us His perfect Bride. It's pretty amazing.     

2) It highlights the exceptional nature of their love - which points to the exceptional nature of the Lord's love for us. After Bella shows him her favorite Edward moments montage, Bella says, "Now you know. No one has ever loved anyone as much as I love you." And then, of course, Edward replies, "There's one exception," meaning that he is the exception. As they make these big claims, they are declaring their love to be the greatest love of all time. That's what red love does - it makes you feel like you're part of something exceptional - special, rare, extraordinary. And that's the kind of love that Jesus has given us. We are part of the greatest love of all time. The Bible is clear that Jesus demonstrated the greatest expression of love: "Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). The truth is, no one has ever loved anyone as much as Christ loves His Bride, and if you're a Christian, that means you.

3) It highlights the eternal nature of their love - which points to the eternal nature of the love we have with Jesus. Since Edward and Bella are immortal in the story, the movie ends by zooming in on the word forever as printed on the last page of the book. Because they don't die, death can't separate them. And for Christians, death can't separate us from our love either (Romans 8:38-39). In fact, our love, Jesus is the One who gives us eternal life, so that we can be with Him forever. With Jesus, the words of the Sanctus Real song Eternal ring true: "In this marriage of our hearts, there is no death do us part. For you are eternal, and I am eternally yours."

  

So there you have it. At the heart of the story, we have a guy and a girl, both completely amazed that the other person would actually love them back and want to spend forever with them. If that's not a picture of the gospel of grace, then I don't know what is. Thankfully, unlike Edward and Bella's story, as Christians, our fairly-tale ending with Jesus is real - grace-filled, exceptional, and eternal. 

And that's why Loving Him is Red.

These are just a few ideas of how the ending of Breaking Dawn points to our longing for Jesus.

Any other ways that you see connections to the gospel from The Twilight Saga? 

Wanna be a part of the greatest love of all time, but don't know how?

I'd love to talk to you about it!

Why I Think This Blog is Worth Writing

When I first heard the song Red by Taylor Swift, I marveled at her clever use of colors to describe feelings. But more than that, I was amazed at how accurately her simple use of the color red described what's it's like to be in love. All she had to say was: "Loving him was red, burning red," and I knew what she meant. Red love is the kind of soul-stirring passion that makes you feel as though you were never really alive or had ever truly loved until you've experienced it. It's the kind of love I've been longing for my whole life.   

Even as I think back to my time in high school, I can remember reading Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen and feeling as though Marianne Dashwood and I were kindred spirits. In saying, "Can the soul really be satisfied with such polite affections? To love is to burn - to be on fire," she opposed the view that love must be moderated rather than all-consuming. So far, Taylor, Marianne, and I are all on the same page. 

But here's where it gets complicated. During my freshmen year in college, God got my attention in a way He never had before. As I heard the Word of God preached, I realized that God wanted to be the supreme relationship of my life. He loved me so much that He entered a covenant - a marriage - with me. And so He deserved to have the primary place in my heart. But I had been giving my heart away to other things - to other lovers - and had broken my end of the covenant. God, however, never stopped loving me. Instead, He sent Jesus to pay the price for my unfaithfulness, and He did so with His life. (Ezekiel 16, Romans 6:23, Hebrews 9:26). 

As my understanding of this reality continued to deepen, I became more and more uncomfortable living my life as I had before. So I started giving things up - things that I loved, wanted, thought I couldn't live without - all in an attempt to love God more than anything else in my life. And then I did the impossible. I gave up my headed-toward-marriage, red relationship and faced the scary reality that I might never get to experience red love ever again. And that was the first time I ever chose to believe that God's love could be greater and more satisfying than the love of another person.

I've been struggling to believe it ever since.

And that's where Taylor Swift and her concept of red love began to really resonate with me. Because I can't just stop myself from wanting to experience this red love that I've always longed for. Instead I can let that longing point me to the fact that I already have a red love - a love that burns so brightly that flood waters could never extinguish its flame (Song of Songs 8:7). And as I consider and experience Jesus' great love for me, my heart responds with a deeper love and affection for Him.

Like the earlier definition of red love says, until the Lord opened my eyes to how much He loved me, "I was never really alive or had ever truly loved." I was dead in my transgressions and sins. But He made me alive with Christ. (Ephesians 2:4-5). And I never really loved anyone til then. I really only loved myself. But in this new life, I no longer live for myself, but for Him, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. (2 Corinthians 5:15, Galatians 2:20). 

So when I really consider Jesus' love and sacrifice, I can't help but love Him in return. I've never met someone quite so kind, so generous, so forgiving, so loving, so patient, so persistent, so humble, so willing to lay down His life... Though I continually reject Him time and time again, He still continues to pursue me; He never gives up. And He's an amazing pursuer, because He's the Only One who knows everything about me and exactly how to make my heart beat faster and fall more in love with Him. He's the One who makes life worth living. He is the One I've been waiting for. Truly, Loving Him is Red.

That's why I'm writing this blog. Because I need to constantly remember that:

1) Anything my heart could ever love or long for in this life is just a shadow of my love and longing for Jesus, since loving and being loved by Him is the most fulfilling and passionate love that I could ever know.  

2) I will never regret giving up everything to make Jesus the first love of my life, because He gave up everything for me.


3) Others can benefit from what God teaches me in the midst of my struggle to love Him with all of my heart.

So I hope you'll join me on this journey to remember that Jesus is the Only Perfect Lover and that Loving Him is Red.

Here's Taylor, singing Red: