I'm pretty sure I was destined to be a hopeless romantic. I was even supposed to be born on Valentine's Day. And it happens to be a holiday that I love.
But it is a bit of a challenge for a hopeless romantic and recovering affirmation junkie to be ok with the fact that no man will be declaring his love for me on Valentine's Day, or any other day, for that matter. I just want someone to tell me I'm loved, that I'm beautiful, that I'm worth fighting for…
I think that's why the song Say Something by A Great Big World* has recently resonated with me so deeply. The melancholy tone of the piano and string arrangement is perfectly paired with the devastating lyrical repetition of "say something, I'm giving up on you." The song is truly a heartbreaking and beautifully humble plea for the singer's love to be returned. He just wants his lady to tell him that she loves him, to give him a reason to stay. The problem is…there's no answer, no declaration of love at the song's end. Just silence...
And that's the silence I often live in. I hear other men declaring their love for the ladies around me. But none do for me. And it makes me wonder. Is there something wrong with me? Am I too ugly? Am I not godly enough? Am I too much of something and too little of something else? What is wrong with me? Am I really and truly unloved?
In the midst of all this questioning, what I want is for some godly guy to just say something to stop me from this downward spiral, to tell me that I'm wrong and that I am loved by him.
But it turns out I keep waiting for the wrong person to say something. I keep listening for the wrong voice. The Lord is the one who is constantly saying something to me.
Here's what He said recently:
"You couldn't hear me over all the other voices, so I decided to quiet them. Are you listening?
I think that you are the most lovely and beautiful of all women (Song of Solomon 1:8). I love you. I created you. There is no one like you, and I am glad to call you my own (Isaiah 43:1). Don't ever forget it. Don't let the other voices drown me out. Because they will come, and they will scream loudly, but what I have spoken is the truth (John 17:17). Don't forget it. Put away your jealousy, your pride, your anger, your bitterness (Ephesians 4:31). They have no place for a woman who fears me. But if you humble yourself, I will exalt you (James 4:10). I promise you this, and that means I will surely do it.
I love you (Isaiah 43:4). More than you know. I died to rescue you, to get you, and I'm not giving up on you now. I will never give you up (Hosea 11:8). Come to me and I will give you the words of eternal life to restore your weary soul (John 6:68, Psalm 19:7). Don't let them go. Keep them in your heart always (Psalm 119:11, Deuteronomy 11:18). I love you. Nothing can change that. Not height nor depth, not angels nor demons, not life not death or anything else in all creation will be able to separate you from the love I have for you that's found in Jesus Christ (Romans 8:38-39). Nothing. So don't be afraid.
You are loved. Always. Nothing can change that. Nothing. So don't run away. What you're looking for is here, with me. Come to me, and I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28). Don't run. Just stay. I love you. More than words. So let your words be few, and keep listening (Ecclesiastes 5:2). I'm always ready to speak, to lavish my love on you (1 John 3:1, Ephesians 1:4-8). You're the one who hasn't been listening. But listen now (Hebrews 12:25). I am ready to show you love you've never known, love you could only even dream of (Ephesians 3:19). It's here. It's with me. Stay with me. Abide in me (John 15). Life is found here. You find your life when you lose it (Matt 10:39). So let it go. Give it up. Don't try to hold onto it. Pour out your life like a drink offering to me (Philippians 2:17, 2 Timothy 4:6). I will honor it, I promise (John 12:26). You will not be put to shame (Isaiah 54:4). Anything you give up, I will give back to you one hundred times as much (Mark 10:29-30).
Don't worry. I will take care of you. I am watching over your life. You don't have to be afraid with me (Matthew 6:25-34). Just trust. You can trust me. I will never leave you or forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6). I have given you everything you need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3). You have it. Use it. Pursue it. Pursue me like I have pursued you. Never let me go. Stay with me til I have blessed you. Wrestle with me (Genesis 32:24-26). Just stay with me. Don't run away. I love you. Always. Nothing can change that. Nothing. Nothing can change who you are. Your identity is wrapped up in me. Embrace it. Savor it. This is my heart poured out for you. This is my body broken for you. This is my blood spilled for you (Luke 22:19-20). This is my love.
In this is love, not that you loved me, but that I loved you and gave up my life, gave up my son for you (1 John 4:10). There is no greater love than this that someone lay down his life for his friends. You're my friend. Keep my commands (John 15:13-14). That's how I know you love me (John 14:15). So stay. Stay in my love. Don't run. Don't leave. Stay. I want to show you real love. I have it. It's here. It's for you. It's real. It can never be broken. Take a chance and don't ever look back. Don't go back to your old life (Ephesians 4:17-24). Don't long for those other adoring voices to sing your praises. They mean nothing. They can't give you life. They can't give you hope. So stop fighting me. I have what's best for you. I promise. And it's here. Love is here."
So if you're like me, and you just want someone to tell you you're loved this Valentine's Day, listen for the voice that's always speaking. Store up God's Word in your heart. If you ask Him to say something to you, He will. He won't remain silent. That's why He has given us His Word and has ultimately spoken to us through His Son (Hebrews 1:2).
Because of Jesus, God wants to tell you that you're loved more than you could ever imagine.
Will you listen?
On Valentine's Day and every day, Loving Him is Red!
* You may have heard the version of Say Something that features Christina Aguilera. I happen to be partial to the version I posted above, which doesn't feature any female vocals. I find that when I listen to the Christina version, I'm more apt to focus on the harmonies, but the original version allows me to focus more on the words and to feel the emotion of the song more poignantly.